Follow us on Pinterest
Welcome! Log In | Register |
Log In with

The Diet Wreckers in Your Life

  • Comment Comments (8)
  • Print Print
Sure, she looks sweet, but that cookie monster is up to no good. Here's how to cope when friends and loved ones sabotage your weight-loss success.

How to Get Support from Your Partner

Before Allison Orphy, 27, of Iowa, Louisiana, dines out with friends, she checks the restaurant's calorie counts online. She used to look them up at the table, but it drove her pals crazy. It wasn't the phone use that offended them; it was what she was doing. "They'd say, 'Why can't you just order?'" says Orphy, who has dropped 55 pounds in the past two years and wants to lose 60 more. "Most of them think I'm miserable, because I ask for veggies with no butter." But Orphy has quietly persisted, and now her friends are more accepting of her lifestyle change. "Sometimes, one of them will even wave away the breadbasket," she says.

Diet experts say it's not unusual for the people whom you think would support you the most -- BFFs, family members, significant others -- to try to derail your weight-loss goals, especially when you first make changes. You, only thinner, may intimidate them, says psychologist Judith Beck, PhD, president of the Beck Institute for Cognitive Behavior Therapy in Philadelphia, and author of The Beck Diet Solution. "They may be scared that you won't need them in your life after you drop a dress size." But you don't have to end a relationship to stay on your diet. Understand why people tempt you with diet-breaking treats, and then use these strategies to clear the air and stay on track.

Your Partner

See that sweet guy cuddling on the couch with you? Sure, he loves you, but he's feeling lukewarm about the newly energized eat-right part of you. Jennifer Jacks, 29, of Shreveport, Louisiana, who went from a post-pregnancy weight of 230 pounds to 160, can relate. "My husband says, 'Come on, today can be your cheat day.' That wouldn't be an issue if it weren't every day," she says.

Blame insecurity and even jealousy for driving your guy to shoot down your healthy cooking. "Your lifestyle changes can feel threatening to your spouse," Beck says. "He may feel that if you lose weight, you'll start getting more attention from other people, and maybe you won't find him as attractive."

If you suspect he's intimidated by the new you, Susan Bowerman, RD, assistant director of the Center for Human Nutrition at the University of California, Los Angeles, suggests that you try this script: "I know my new food plan is a lot for you to handle, because we like to split dishes at restaurants and we have fun eating together. I'm concerned about my health, so I'm working hard to eat better. My commitment to us has not changed, though. Would you support me and consider joining me?" Have this conversation during a casual moment and avoid doing it before a meal, when your guy may be more sensitive to the issue.

Jacks and her husband have talked openly about why he tries to get her to cave. "He admits that it's not as much fun to sit down with a pizza or cookies when accompanied by a healthy eater," she says. "And seeing me lose weight makes him more aware that he should eat less." Their solution: a weekly date night. "We try to play racquetball first, which we enjoy together, and then go out for a cheat meal," she says. "It gives both of us something to look forward to."

What do you think of this story?  Leave a Comment.

What do you think? Review this story!
libby70302 wrote:

I just started using a new gourmet instant coffee that helps reduce appetite, eliminate cravings, reduce portion sizes, decrease stored carbs and recharge your metabolism to burn more fat. Javita Burn + Control works because it contains two safe, proven herbs: YERBA MATE: Helps suppress appetite, and increases caloric burn rate. GARCINIA CAMBOGIA: Helps decrease your appetite and reduces the amount of carbs stored as fat. Visit to learn more!

5/23/2014 06:17:48 PM Report Abuse
kmallmond wrote:

This was a good article. What it didn't address is the typical skinny woman with a fat friend syndrome. When the fat friend starts to lose weight, the skinny friend will feel threatened. Ladies, we all know one.

10/19/2013 12:49:47 PM Report Abuse
EthanChong wrote:

Thanks for the great article! But would you mind checking out the most powerful formula to fast and permanently weight loss too? Here's the link at

9/10/2013 01:55:52 AM Report Abuse
jonyfitn wrote:

So with that in mind, how do we get more people involved in taking control of their life by eating a reasonable diet and getting a modicum of exercise at a minimum? Again, very tricky. As for approaching people or opening a dialogue of some sort, I just go assumptive that they are already doing something about their fitness level, regardless of what they look like. So my first question is always "Where do you work out now"? If they are a member somewere or are doing some sort of exercise,

3/11/2013 01:16:15 PM Report Abuse
trent_il wrote:

My husband gives me a hard time sometimes about how I rarely eat a menu item the way it appears on the menu (I ask for no mayonnaise or dressing on the side most frequently). He also can't stand how I always use napkins to take extra grease off of pizza. But, I stuck to it, put up with his comments, and now he is used to most of the modifications I insist on(even if they do still bug him a little!).

1/23/2013 11:26:48 AM Report Abuse

Add your comment

You must be logged in to leave a comment. Register | Log In

Please confirm your comment by answering the question below and clicking "Submit Comment."

Todays Daily Prize
More Smart Savings
Fitness Magazine on Facebook