The Single Girl's Survival Kit
Can't Commit? Here's Why
Commitment angst is a guy thing, right? Hold on there, lady. Truth is, "Women choose men with commitment capacities similar to their own," says Elina Furman, author of Kiss and Run. She describes five phobic femmes and offers tips on how they can rewrite these self-sabotaging scripts.The Nitpicker
Spots a breakup-worthy flaw
The Advice: "Remember the fault law: If you seek, you shall find. Prioritize your 'mate shopping list' into must-haves and luxury items. And remember -- you're not perfect either," says Furman.The Serial Dater
Has a bachelor up at bat, another on deck, and a third waiting in the dugout
The Advice: "This is ego-courting," notes Furman. "Every time you go out with a new guy, you get a whole new set of compliments. Go on a dating fast and give yourself positive reinforcement instead of getting it from men."The Free Spirit
Thinks commitment cramps her style
The Advice: Furman says, "Artists don't have to suffer alone to 'create.' Being committed doesn't mean you're giving in to convention. Make the relationship as unique as you are."The Damsel in Distress
Emotionally wounded man-hater
The Advice: "Even if he ran off with your car, your money, and your best girlfriend, look at your accountability. How did you enable it to happen?" asks Furman. "Next time, do it differently."The Long-Distance Runner
Invests in one five-year relationship after another, but never crosses the finish line
The Advice: "Make a firm decision -- in or out?" explains Furman. "And consider your relationship patterns. If you pick fights when you're unhappy and you're doing it now, there's the answer."
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