50 Mind, Body, Spirit Mistakes (Even Smart Women Make)
21. You haven't learned from your parents
How mom and dad communicated is a good indicator of how you and your spouse will get along, says Ahrons. Their marriage was dysfunctional? Improve yours by avoiding similar behaviors-such as bickering over trivial matters.
22. When it comes to love, you ignore friends’ advice
A recent Purdue University study found that women are particularly astute at predicting whether a friend’s romance will last. "A friend will be able to see the negative aspects of a relationship that you may be overlooking," says study author Christopher Agnew, Ph.D.
23. You don't set aside "me" time
A recent study found that people with a packed social calendar were more likely to become ill. Try to take one night a week to give yourself a pedicure, try out a new recipe or pursue another hobby-it will help you unwind and stay healthy.
24. You always go solo
Being overly independent can lead to loneliness, which can cause depression. "Friends and family can support you in tough times," says Sapadin. "They can also offer different perspectives when you're trying to resolve a dilemma or navigate a major life change."
25. You’re quick to criticize
"When we criticize others, we're often projecting our own insecurities," says Ahrons. We're also risking offending people. "Before you point out another person's shortcomings, consider whether you have the same ones and how you might change."
26. You're in an unhealthy relationship
Whether it's with a parent, partner or friend, a one-way relationship can be exhausting. Approach the other person and explain how you feel; if all else fails, consider breaking it off. (If you're in an abusive situation, seek help immediately at 800-799-SAFE).
27. You don’t volunteer
A Cornell University study found that contributing your time or money increases feelings of self-worth and control over your life. To find a volunteering opportunity you'd enjoy, log on to volunteermatch.org.
28. You don’t get along with your mother
Recent research shows that women who maintain good relationships with their mothers tend to have higher self-esteem and are less likely to suffer from eating disorders. If you have unresolved issues, sit down and talk. Then spend time together to renew your bond.
29. You’re holding a grudge
Not forgiving another person causes great mental distress (and probably isn't hurting the other person at all). Discuss the offending incident with the person or people involved. Releasing bottled-up feelings will help you leave the past behind.
30. You never cry
Research has found that tears help flush stress-related chemicals that build up in your tear ducts when you're upset. If you feel the urge, find a quiet place and grab a Kleenex-it will calm and refresh you.
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