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An RD Confesses: "I Had Bulimia"

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Jessica Setnick's obsession with having a perfect body turned into a life-threatening eating disorder.

Battling Bulimia

The moment I realized that "perfect" wasn't all it was cracked up to be, I was kneeling on the carpeted floor of my mother's bathroom. The remains of my dinner bobbed in the toilet basin, a floating testament to my dedication, determination, and sheer willpower. Here was proof that I could do whatever it took to be, well, perfect. But as I leaned against the wall, reality closed in around me. This was perfect? Swollen, bloodshot eyes. A throat so inflamed it was difficult to swallow. My self-esteem in tatters. Where just moments before, I'd felt relief -- pride, even -- suddenly there was only despair. Sitting there, wasted from the effort of forcing myself to vomit for the umpteenth time that week, I was tired of doing this. Tired of hating myself that much. That night was the beginning of the end of my battle with bulimia.

The ironic part is, today I'm a registered dietitian with a master's degree. That night in the bathroom was a week before I started graduate school, planning to become a sports nutritionist for athletes. And there I was, literally flushing the subject of my education down the drain.

Next:  The Perfect Child


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lilgirl024680 wrote:

THANK YOU for writing this. I wish more people would. Strength comes from numbers.

1/23/2012 08:04:33 PM Report Abuse
jbworkman1 wrote:

Wow it's like this is my EXACT story. Same name, even 1 semester from being a RD. I've struggled for about 6 years but finally quit about a year ago when I truly saw my image in the mirror 5'10 &120 lbs. Only a few slips in a year¿s time. I try hard to get the message across that we are worth more than being another thin girl in America. I still struggle with the idea that my body is okay the way it is , by faith I get through. We all have struggles, this WAS ours.

11/11/2009 08:12:23 PM Report Abuse

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